The last 5 weeks I’ve engulfed myself (as much as humanly possible!) in Brene Brown’s online course on Oprah’s Lifeclass series. The topic is about “The Gifts of Imperfection”.When the class started I was so pumped and ready to “perfect” it! But it all coincided with my mom’s knee surgery, work, and all the great gifts that life throws our way along the line. So I fell behind and week after week I was getting more stressed to catch up with the rest of the students (I have a competitive nature too! Go figure!).
It’s one of those courses that you can study any time, on your time even when the course is done, but I didn’t want it that way. I wanted it perfectly done right!
Because I’m somewhat of a perfectionist! I say somewhat because for the past year I’ve worked hard to shed some of it but still have hang onto to some other ones: multi-tasking and making sure all is done to perfection, being at 10,000 places at once, always having a clean and tidy house, organization to the MAX, and looking good doing it all! I’m exhausted just thinking about it! LOL! Ooooh!
To make a long story short, after a few aha-moments and breakthroughs, I’m finally “imperfectly” caught up and I have learned so much about myself in such a short time that I hadn’t in a long time. WOW! Go Brene! Thank you.
I even tested myself in some small ways, one of them by putting a recent un-photoshopped close-up photo of my daily look, taken by a dear friend, as my Facebook profile photo. Let’s just say none of my other photos have gotten this much attention and I’m so grateful for the love and the experience. It’s not perfect and I love it.
People can relate to “imperfect”: It’s real. And yet we all have the Perfection Disease running through our veins in some or many areas in our lives. We put ourselves through this pain so no one else can. We build a “perfect” shield around us to live a happy life! How ironic!
Here’s an example: I have a few friends and clients whom have been struggling with procrastination. Through my own learnings over the years, I explained to them that procrastination is a child of perfection – “If I can’t do it perfectly then I won’t do it now!” So much self-pressure and self-inflicted pain! So if you’re going to procrastinate do it with awareness and ease rather than running away from “perfect”. 😀
As Brene puts it: “Perfection is a self-destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, live perfectly, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame.”
We can discuss this subject further as it can go on and on forever, but I’m still in the middle of this course and haven’t quite wrapped my brain around all the information pouring in. I just LOVE the ride so far and wanted to share it with you and give you something to think about.
I can tell you this much though: Give yourself love, compassion and room for error. The more the weight comes off the better you perform and live a fulfilled life.
You deserve it.
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